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Funny Movie Quotes

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
If I'm not back in five minutes... wait longer!

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
Lois: How would you like it if I made your life a living hell?
Ace: Well, Lois, I'm not quite ready for a relationship right now, but maybe I'll give you a call sometime.

Dumb & Dumber
She wrote me a 'john-deere' letter... something about me not listening enough, I don't know... I wasn't really paying attention.

The Addams Family
Pugsley: We're not shy!
Wednesday: We're contagious.

Addams Family Values
(Gomez refers to the girl popping out of the cake at a bachelor party)
Was she in there before you baked it?

Addams Family Values
Gomez: Children, why do you hate the baby?
Pugsley: We don't hate him. We just wanna play with him.
Wednesday: Especially his head.

Addams Family Values
Little Girl: ...and then Mommy kissed Daddy, and the angel told the stork, and the stork flew down from heaven, and put the diamond in the cabbage patch, and the diamond turned into a baby!
Pugsley: Our parents are having a baby too.
Wednesday: They had sex.

There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?

I'm so rich, I wish I had a dime for every dime I have.

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